The Recessions Boomerangers: It’s Back Home To Mother
The UK recession has forced half a million middle aged adults aged 35-44 to live back with their parents. This new trend, known as the “Boomerang” generation, is fuelled by a belief that moving back home with parents is a quick solution to to an individual’s problems, either (and maybe both) emotional or financial.
But beware, such a move back, conjuring thoughts of a carefree, second childhood is fraught with dangers to a middle aged child. Rarely is it possible for elderly parents to take care of all their child’s domestic needs once again as they did years ago.
Individuals move back home with the clear hope of a carefree, problem free life, often prompted by a loss of a career, a divorce or death of a loved one. It becomes impossible to start out again from scratch with solicitors fees, property rentals and such like becoming unaffordable for those people who also have an estranged family living apart, especially where children are involved. Others fear the real, harsh realities of ending up living in a small flat or apartment on their own in total isolation.
Moving back with parents becomes an increasingly attractive option for some people in these positions. The Boomerangers move back home expecting free shelter, free food and free laundry, to take a break from the harsh realities of their life and retreat back to adolescence, to be taken care of again by a strong father and adoring, nuturing mother.
It doesn’t work this way in the vast majority of cases.
A boomeranger moving back into their parents home to live upsets the parent’s routines. Parents, who by now are elderly have sucumbed to routine and habit, and equally depend on their routines to live their lives. The child moving back home upsets their routines, their life, often resulting in breaking point for parents who are in poor health, both physically and mentally.
The boomeranger’s image of his parents, of how things - and they - used to be can lead to a psychological shock when reality sinks in, the strong dependable parents are now old people, more often than not, needing care themselves. The boomeranger must also cope with learning to live with his parent’s routines and habits, which, in itself, is extremely difficult.
The boomeranger has to learn Patience in order to be able to live back with his parents. There is no doubt that depression, strife, anxiety and pure stress can result from moving back to live with parents. When you visit your parents, you see them as they want to be seen; neat, capable and independent. When you move back in with them, you see them for what they really are: you see their weaknesses, fragility, secrets, fears and poor health.
As humans, we tend to sentimentalise the old, to see them as cuddly old people, but the boomerangers, on living with two old people, are finding out that old people are generally irritating and exasperating.
This is yet another symptom, or side effect, of the reccession that, in it’s own right, is capable of causing untold misery and unknown psychological damage to countless parents and children alike.











January 25th, 2010 at 10:17 am
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